The School Nurse

My kid's spend a lot of time at the school nurse's office. They're never sick, they just like going to visit. When I first heard of her popularity, I thought maybe she was super-model stunning. Then I saw her and clearly there was something else drawing them to her office.

In kindergarten, Max went to the nurse everyday. Why the teacher let him do this is beyond me. I kept wondering, what is it about the school nurse that makes him want to see her so much? Finally, it hit me. The nurse gave out crackers and pretzels! Max takes the fact that his name rhymes with snacks very seriously, so he couldn't let this opportunity pass him by. Thank God, in first and second grade the teachers don't let him out of the classroom that easily.

Ben, on the other hand, still goes to the nurse at least once a week. He has good reason, though. He's a hypochondriac just like me. He has legitimate concerns. His skin is itchy, his leg hurts, his elbow is sore, or he has a back ache. The other day the nurse called me. I answered, by saying "Oy vay!" She went on to say that Ben had been in her office twice because his ear was bothering him. He had no fever and his throat did not appear red. I could have told her that, since Ben was fine when I had seen him only 2 hours earlier. He got on the phone, and I compassionately offered to stick a screwdriver in his ear to make sure there was no blockage. The next thing I knew he was on his way back to class and the nurse was surprised at his quick recovery. I should really teach a parenting course!

Ben and Max each have their own agendas for visiting their friendly school nurse. Max knows he's healthy but can't keep away from snacks, while Ben is sure he's always sick and wants a professional's opinion. I have no doubt that they will both end up the same way. Needing a professional head-shrinker's opinion.