The Ritz Carlton, Orlando

I'm back from my absolutely fantabulous 10 day Florida vacation. We were away from March 9th through the 19th and loved every minute of it. I return with wonderful memories and stories for my blog.

First, we dropped the kids off at my parents house in Melbourne Beach. The next day, we left for 3 nights to attend my husband's conference held at the amazing Ritz Carlton, Orlando. We were greeted warmly with offers of hot chocolate at the front desk and a personal escort to our room. In addition, Mike's company had an array of beverages and snacks, including a variety of fresh baked cookies the size of a small child's head. Having no couth, I began filling an empty 6 pack holder with water bottles and diet coke (I like to stay hydrated) and carried cookies in my hands and under my chin (I'm a pig). The stuck-up wife of one of my husband's associates (her name is Fran but I nick-named her Frown) looked completely appalled, while others started to follow my lead. Truly, I was in paradise. We met up with our friends at the pool and spent the next 3 days eating, drinking and relaxing.

There were a number of note-worthy events that happened during my stay. Much to my surprise, the bellman saw me naked one day. I had just gotten out of the shower and hadn't heard a knock. Someone came in and I assumed it was Mike coming back from the pool. I walked out of the bathroom naked and said, "Hi honey" only to realize it was the bellman delivering a gift from Mike's company. I yelled, "Oh my God!" as he nervously offered to leave the gift by the door. As I ran for cover, I said a loud goodbye and later got lots of laughs from friends hearing my story. I heard the poor schmuck went hysterically blind and took an immediate disability leave. At dinner that night, Mike thought the waiter was extremely attentive to me, even taking the time to walk me to the bathroom located outside of the restaurant when I asked where it was. I figured he must have spoken to the bellman and was expecting a special tip after dinner.

I also spent a lot of time with a woman named Joanie, and feel that I can now call her "my friend". If you have read prior postings in my blog (which really no one has) you know that I have very few people that I consider true friends. Joanie shares my shopping addiction and love of shopping magazines. She has a lot more money than I do, so I can live vicariously through her shopping expeditions. The salesmen at Nordstrom even know her by name and start celebrating when she enters the store. Besides all of this, she is down to earth, funny and thinks I'm hilarious. All of this qualifies her as my friend. On top of all this, she is blonde, skinny and stunning without plastic surgery even though she is 10 years my senior. I am graciously trying to overlook these facts.

I even reconnected with old, and dear friends Kevin and Denise who I have known for 12 years but have spent less time with because they live a distance from us. Life was truly blissful at the Ritz Carlton. Now I'm home wishing someone would escort me to the bathroom and longing for gigantic cookies, the remains of which are still stuck permanently to my thighs.